Wednesday, June 27, 2007


I've been sleeping in my tent in my yard when the weather allows...meaning not too stifling to sleep, with no air movement. Last night was just a perfect night; just right temperature, air movement and enough coolness later on that made it feel wonderful.

I went to bed late after having a Pie Oh My. It's a tiny pie made by Lifestream, a company that I really trust. It was fruity, warm and just sweet enough plus organic and whole grain. But, hey, I'm not fooling myself completely...pie is pie. One wants it but one eats it only once in a blue moon. Of course you all know what a blue moon is? It's when two full moons occur in one month. Not very damn often for sure.

But the night. I lay on my comfortable cot in my tent feeling like the richest person ever. The breeze nearly made me swoon with its sweetness. The night was dark. I guess clouds were covering the moon cause I think it's actually full on the 30th or thereabouts. I was as content as any human can be. No particular longing or wanting or hoping. Just the joy of a dark, sweet night with sleep coming easily.
I live in the world but not in the world that the TV and the press create 'cause that is what it is... created by them. If you buy into their view of what is going on you'd be paralyzed with fear and frustration. That world is only one of many that exists. I like mine so much better.

Into the wee hours of the morning, I started hearing the birds wake up. It is mornings like this that I so wish I could identify each call. I know the doves by their intimate, deep cooing to each other but as it grew lighter several other birds chimed in creating a symphony of bird calls. When it was truly light enough to see out of my tent, I watched a squirrel dancing up a tree and across a wire.

On this particular morning (each one is so different, of course) getting out of bed was as natural and as easy as a leaf releasing from its branch. Even though I went to bed past midnight, I was up easily and happily at 6:30. It was nice not having a clock in the tent. I got to play the time guessing game. Turns out that it was earlier than I thought. There's a new one.

Speaking of leaves on trees....for some years now I have done a series of exercises in the morning called The Five Tibetian Rites. Nothing exotic, really. Just a series of exercises that seem to center me. This morning I took my mat out onto my back deck. I usually do them in the house, simply forgetting to do them outside. This morning as I did my exercises, one of which I need to lie down on my back for, I noticed the leaves on the silver maple in my yard. They seemed to shimmer in sections, first one section would tremble with the light breeze and then another. It was beautiful to watch.

Oh, maybe there is something way too simple about my little life. Maybe I should still be kicking around the money-making ball for a last go before I get too old to do it. Nah. I don't think so.

The night, the morning and even now at the coffee shop, although I have no particular reason to be happy and also a myriad of reasons to be happy, happiness has moved close to me like the familiar arm of an old friend draped around my shoulder. It's something to be thankful for.

Oh, and another thing to be thankful for. My beloved son, Ben and his darling girl of a wife, Rebecca are actually going to make their dreams come true by moving out west. It looks like Portland is their destination. Here is a request: If anyone knows about any kind of job/housing opportunities there, I'd be delighted to pass the info on to them in their adventure of moving West. They certainly don't need me to help them find anything. They are both competent, very bright and industrious people. I know they'll both find what they need but if I can offer some assistance, I'd like to do that.

So thanks for reading. Let peace rest upon your shoulders today.

Sunday, June 24, 2007


Sunday...a day of holiness. A day to devote to pondering deeper meanings. It's a day to think on higher things; things not of this world. It is a day to be good. So, I am. I was...I was so good.

Today shows me again that no day is like any other...each presents it's own gifts of understanding. Some days reveal something that might never have been shown before. Or a day might present some new person who opened a door for you. Or some story that lit your eyes and built a small, lovely fire in your heart.
Some days inspire glorious thoughts that might have been dormant for a long time. Some days ignite some passions that may have been forgotten. Some days make you smile and smile and smile. Some days are holy.

Like today.

I am once again reminded that I have so much and that so much is possible and I feel nothing but gratitude for these gentle reminders on this holiest of days.

Saturday, June 23, 2007


I belong to a poetry meet-up group and our assignment this time is to write a poem using the theme "temptation." I really think this is going to be an easy one for me. Temptation is really every where, isn't it. At least in my life it is.

I'm tempted to eat more than I should. I'm tempted to have desserts when I know they are not good for me. I'm tempted to stay up very late knowing I'll feel tired the next day I'm tempted to take off for another trip somewhere..maybe around the world this time. I'm tempted to dye my hair black. I'm tempted to tell certain people exactly what I think of them. I'm tempted to spend money on renovating this tiny little cottage of mine and...

last but certainly, completely, not least is I am tempted by someone that I simply can't allow myself to be tempted by.

But the "what ifs" are delectable, succulent and tasty. That's where it'll stay...just on this side of the temptation fence. So, yep, I know just what temptation's an amazing and a dangerous feeling at the same time. To be indulged only in my mind.

Whew! I'd better get busy writing that poem...that meeting is coming up soon but first I'm gonna go watch Last Tango In Paris...I've never seen it and now might be a good time...hmmm.

Friday, June 15, 2007


Yeah, OK, so I've started sleeping outside, in a tent. I know that when you get old you can get by with some pretty strange shit but what about sleeping in a tent? Is that "too old lady crazy?" I don't think so. I think it's just getting to what's essential.

Whatever. I want to be out in the natural world somehow and sleeping outside seems to fill the bill for this urban old gal. It's kinda fun turning off the flashlight and settling in for a natural noise filled night. The insects just go apeshit. It's a regular cacophony out there at night...something I've totally missed sleeping indoors.

OK, so it's not for everyone. I get that. But hey don't knock it 'til you've tried it, OK?

It's nothing like the Wiltshire Motel in Breezewood PA but it's nice.
The Wiltshire was a total blessing to find in this shithole of a town. Breezewood is nothing more, really, than a glorified truckstop, unless I missed the main town, which I'm pretty sure I didn't. But staying at the Wiltshire was like an oasis in a truckstop desert. I highly recommend that sweet little motel with its kindly owner.

It's not as cool, however, as sleeping outside. The Wiltshire was great but sleeping out under the that's a real treat!